My Lenten journey- Week 1

This year, after several years spent not observing it, I made the decision to engage Lent. Although its not necessarily part of my upbringing or church background, I started observing Lent my senior year of high school with a number of my Roman Catholic co-workers. At that point, all I knew about Lent was that it started on a Wednesday and it involved giving something up until Easter. Over the years, I’ve given up chocolate, coffee, and meat on Fridays, and I can’t say that it made a substantial difference in my relationship with God. In fact, I’d venture a guess that it simply made me whinier and more difficult to be around (particularly the year I gave up coffee).

This year my approach was different. Lent is a season of preparation. It’s a time of reflection, soul-searching, and repentance. It’s not simply a time of abstinence, but also a time to engage God at a deeper level. With that in mind, in consultation with God, I made the decision to fast movies and television.

It sounds easy, maybe even a tad bit silly. I don’t really have time for those things anyway, do I? You’d be surprised.

What I’ve realized in the past few days is what I use television and movies for. All too frequently, I use movies to escape reality. This isn’t tragic, but it surprised me how often it happens. Instead of engaging God after a frustrating day or when I’m feeling emotional, or making any effort to process what’s going on inside my head, I simply sit in front of a screen and shut down.

Even worse, I (and others) use television and movies as a means of luring me to stop and rest. I am on the go a lot, and recently, I had bronchitis. Although I conceded to two sick days, per my doctors orders, once I returned to work I continued at the ridiculous pace of my normal life, not considering that I needed to continue to rest. On two occasions, friends asked me to watch movies/television programs with them simply because they knew it would get me to sit still for a period of time and relax.

It was noticeably quieter around my apartment this past weekend. The television wasn't on as I got ready for work in the morning, or as I took care of chores around the apartment. My times with God have gotten a bit longer. And I’m learning, ever so slowly, how to stop. It raises more questions then anything. Do I trust God enough to stop and rest? When did I stop consulting God about scheduling and start overscheduling on a nearly daily basis?

I’m still working on the answers….but so far its just been helpful to pause long enough to ask the questions.